Recently, a bill was passed to ban TikTok. If any one knows me, they know that I am an avid TikTok user and it’s easy to become engulfed in the app. TikTok has basically replaced Google, the news, and other social media platforms. If you want a new recipe, there are wonderful cooks on the app. If you’re traveling to a new city and want to know the best places to visit, it’s on there. Even if you are looking to date, someone will slide in your DM…or you can slide in theirs. It’s a fun app for sure, but more than that, it’s educational. Most have even gone to the extent to say TikTok has taught us more than school. I can somewhat agree and surely appreciate the information freely given by my fellow TikTok users.

I appreciate all of the information (and laughs) I get from TikTok. Most of us who are slightly addicted to it were once adamant about not getting on that kids app, and now look at us. It’s funny, but I can say it has taught me more than a few dances and cute sayings. It’s the fact that people take the time to inform you on important matters in a way that can help the masses. I heard a sermon that said it’s irresponsible to not give people knowledge when you know they need it. It’s the ones who aren’t just showing us dance routines, but breaking down scripture to be more understood. It’s the ones who give people insight to mental health awareness or the ones who try to share information about money management. The laughs are needed, but the information is outstanding and frankly the loss of the app seems almost detrimental.

I believe teaching and helping others is my gift. If I can help just one person, my living is not in vain. It comes down to the point of asking yourself if you are helpful to others or are you all about self. We all need help, but sometimes you have to be the helper. My church calls it being a destiny helper. I love that phrase because it’s sounds important. It is important to step outside of self and help people in need. That doesn’t mean you have to give all of your money or time, but if you do have some to spare it’s okay to share. This is a call for you all reading this to see how you can make a difference in someone else’s life. Be honest, when was the last time you helped someone? If it’s been a while, now seems like a great time to start. Be Sweet.

Lately, I’ve been trying to be very intentional about what I do and how I want to spend the year of 2024. With that being saying, I have been trying to be active in church in order to gain a spiritual advantage for the year. Recently, I went to a singles ministry meeting, and the leader stated that she would say “honey I’m home” when she walked in her house in preparation for meeting her husband and being married. That’s the kind of energy that I want to incorporate into my life because I’m ready for a breakthrough. I will not be silent this year because I need something different, something better.

When you have been through a tough season, the one after it is crucial. You can’t afford to learn the same lesson twice because it robbed you of your joy too much the first time. You shouldn’t have to learn every lesson the hard way anyway. This is when discipline, patience, accountability, and intentionality come into play. You have to be open and honest with yourself about what you want out of life. Do I want mediocrity or do I believe that I deserve more? I’ll answer for you…you deserve more! And now is as good a time as any to go for it.

The Clark sisters song comes to mind as I wrote this blog. I expect a miracle every day, God will make a way out of no way. That’s the mindset I want to have daily, speaking into the atmosphere positive things. The Bible does say to speak those things that aren’t as if they were (Romans 4:17). If you want your day to be peaceful, get some scripture to back up a peaceful day. If you need a good doctor’s report, look up and speak scripture that aligns with your needs. It’s time to stop being quiet and open your mouth. Closed mouth don’t get fed, and I need to be fed spiritually (and physically) because I want MORE. What are you willing to believe and ask God for in this season?

One of my favorite things to do is go to the movies. I feel like ever since I left Memphis in 2019, that has been my favorite pastime. I go to see a new movie probably 3 times a month because I would like to say I’m a movie buff. (I’m not.) But recently I was leaving the movies at the mall and saw a sign that read, “See something, say something.” Needless to say, they weren’t talking about a movie. That simple message pricked my heart and I took that as a spiritual message. I always pray for the Holy Spirit to open my spiritual eyes and ears, and that is exactly what happened. So I felt the need to share this simple yet profound revelation with my readers.

Nowadays, society is so crazy that you have to keep an eye out for all kinds of craziness. Not everyone goes out with good intentions, so it’s best to be vigilant and aware of your surroundings. But the next step is to make others aware when it’s not safe because we’re all in this life thing together. It’s the same on this Christian walk as well. We all know that most times it’s a faith walk, not a cake walk when you decide to live for the Lord. When we go to the movies, go out to restaurants, or go out of town, we want to tell the world. Just take a look at your beloved social media sites and it’s filled with reviews and stories. I believe it should be the same when you see something that God has done. The goodness of God is worthy to be shared.

When I think about how good God has been to me, He surely gets the HIGHEST ratings from me. For me, the miraculous things God has done is worth sharing more than ANY movie, food experience, or vacation. Testimonies are for telling. Old church used to have a testimony period in church and you couldn’t keep the Saints from telling their stories from something as small as waking up this morning to being healed from their illness. New church has somehow gotten too sophisticated and has time restraints on services, so we don’t get to really hear about testimonials from people. But aren’t you glad that we have all of this technology? No excuse now!

More important than your five star meal, is what God brought you through. Your vacation to the beach looks fabulous, but tell us more about how you were down to your last dime and Jesus stepped in on time. I know some people get ashamed of their low points and want to keep it all hush hush, but your story can help a person who doesn’t realize it’s possible to get through. No shame in telling someone that you never would have made it if it weren’t for the goodness of the Lord. If you see something, say something. Your story brings God glory. So let me ask you, what has God done for you lately?

A damsel in distress, I am not. In fact, I’ve probably been the knight in shining armor more times than I’d like to admit. I could say I blame those Disney movies growing up, but if you look past the natural storylines, you’ll see those princesses were strong too. That’s why I like the remake of those old fairytales because they tend to shed more light on the resiliency instead of the obsession with wanting to be saved by a man. News flash, a man ALREADY saved me! And it’s an amazing thing that all I had to do was confess that I believe. But before I get too churchy for you, I can say I once was looking for my prince in order for my life to get better. Well it’s coming on 38 years of living and no prince in sight.

It’s my birthday month and it’s a cause for celebration. I celebrate my own resilience and understanding of what life should look like. Who needs a prince when I can be my own Queen? You’ve heard me say it a million times, but 2023 was no joke. That thang tried to knock me low, but I’m no wimp! I had to get a better grip on reality and instead of trying to be someone else’s everything, I had to become my own everything. Yes, I have lots of family and friends who are supportive, but at the end of the day you’re left with yourself and God. Well, God pulls His weight so now it’s time for me to do the same.

Today’s sermon was very helpful on my forward journey. The preacher said if you’re going through, it means you have the capacity for it. You ever just sit and think about the confidence that God has in you that He knows you have it in you to be on the strong warrior team. We don’t like it as we’re going through, but to think that the creator of the universe has that much confidence in you is wild! Like thanks for believing in me, but please sir God help me to get past this wilderness to my promised land. But patience is a virtue that I need to work on for this year, because it will come in due time if I “faint not.”

I jokingly say, January and February were trial months for the new year. My new year started in March because I was still showing some symptoms of last year’s wildfires. But God! I have a new attitude and a more positive outlook on my life. The number one thing is that I refuse to settle for less than ever again. Usually you don’t hear people say this, but I’m going to revert back to my 20’s. I was a little on the wild side, but I was a Tough cookie. I didn’t take no mess, I asked for what I wanted, and I worked hard to better myself. Year 38, I’m coming out the gate swinging and going for my next step in life. After all, this year has been deemed the year of the bounce back. Stay tuned for the amazing things God has in store for me! And continue to Be Sweet.

Okay single girlies, listen up! This blog is going to be a little bumpy, but tighten your seat belts. If you’re not a Christian woman, this may not resonate as much with you, but stick around for the finale. It may bless your soul either way. By now, most of us have ran across the woman on TikTok who has posed the question, “Who TF did I marry?” Although it’s meant to be a tell-all and surely a rhetorical (reflective) question, we have all tuned in to see what the answer may be. Now I will say that although I did not listen to that 50 plus part story because that’s too much for me, I still got the gist of her story. She married a lying, manipulative man. Our next question should surely be how did she let it get to that point.

While chatting with my sister about the woman questioning who she married, we came to the same conclusion she did, she was desperate for a relationship. And we all know when you’re desperate you tend to settle for way less than what you’re worthy of from a man. Let’s just be honest, we have all been there. As a matter of fact, it wasn’t but last year I was in that same position. Most of us come to our senses and pick our standards off the floor. Others let our standards fall to the depths of hell dealing with our own “Legion”, and have to work a lot harder to get back on track to healthy self worth. Nonetheless, we get on a road to recovery. And many times, after a hard failed relationship, we (finally) turn to God. No need to be ashamed or anything of that nature, but pressing times lead us to a stronger relationship with our maker. The Bible does say when we are weak, we are made strong through The Lord.

We, as Christians, have likened Jesus to many things. If you grew up in church, you have heard him called the rose of Sharon, lily of the valley, bright and morning star. Old school church mentioned him as a will in the middle of a will, way maker, and so much more. When we get single and too churchy, we tell people that Jesus is our man or our boyfriend. But I’d like to say that’s a downgrade for what Jesus truly is in our lives. Honestly, I wouldn’t want to get back with ANY of my old boyfriends, so that’s a slap in the face to Jesus. Jesus is my SAVIOR! Jesus died for my sins so I can have eternal life. Now, how many of your ex-boyfriends would die for you? I’m willing to bet probably none of them. And even if they would, it wouldn’t guarantee you a relationship with the creator of the universe, God.

My point is, let Jesus be Jesus. As a single woman, we have to deal with so many things. One, people questioning why we’re single. Second, this awful dating scene that has poop and pee in it. And lastly, trying to still have faith in love. Let me tell you, the continued faith in love is rough when you have been through so much with men. Like the woman wondering who she married, we have to question our picks time and time again. Why were we cheated on, why were we ghosted, why have we not met our husbands? Funny yet true answer, only Heaven knows! But until then, we should continue to build our relationship with The Lord. We should work on self so when our kingdom spouse does show up, we’ll be healed enough to receive the love. So ladies, don’t dwell on men and idolize marriage. Work on that next degree, get in some good self care, join a church ministry, learn a new skill. You owe it to yourself to love on you because then and only then will you be able to allow someone to love you. Be sweet.

I must start this blog off by saying I’m in no way, fashion, or form a relationship guru. I will say that I’ve learned a lot about myself in relationships and I’m ready to tell my story. In light of recent events (if you know, you know), I’ve come to realize that hindsight really is 20/20. With that being said, I have to give myself grace or I’ll be a whole wreck. When you are a genuine person, sometimes people take advantage of that. And when you’re a Christian woman with good intentions and high empathy and understanding, dating can really get the best of you. This blog isn’t about any particular person I’ve dated, just the subject of love bombing. Take it how you want, it’s MY blog and you can write your own if you feel compelled to do so. Just in time for V-day…

When it comes to being a spiritual woman, you have to be careful about what you pray for because the devil hears your prayers too. I’ve even heard of women coming up with passwords with God to shed a light on who their future husbands are. Do what you do, but just remember to keep a good line of communication with God to ensure that you’re on the right path. Before I knew what love bombing was, I had a pretty big ego. I thought that I was such an amazing woman that men were falling for me fast. Little did I know, these men were actually trying to get ME to fall fast so they could get me to be with them. This can be done by being overly affectionate, communicating via text/call all day, and seeing each other often. It’s very easy to fall prey to it because you think you’re just that awesome. That’s just them hyping you up to bring you down.

My counselor recently told me that when it comes to dating, you should take it slow. We all know this, but when you’re in the moment all that flies out the window! I will say that when you don’t have hobbies or other things to take your mind off of day to day life, it’s easy to be engulfed in a prospective partner. I will also say, since leaving my hometown, I don’t have much of a life. I was a social busybody in Memphis, and now I’m kind of chill with not much to do. This is how I fell deeply in “love” with a love bomber TWICE! I’m not saying any names, but I will say it was a roller coaster of a ride and I was glad to get off! They swoop you off your feet fast, gaslight you, and make you feel like you’re the only girl in the world. Who wouldn’t like that?!

You feel so good about your new found love that you don’t question it. With the love bomber, they’re trying to keep you from seeing their true self so they do everything to win you over. It works because they’re good at manipulating. But sure enough, their “representative” can’t keep up with the lie, so their true colors start to show. And it’s like a punch in the gut to see someone in the true light, but it’s at that moment when you realize that you need to break free. They’ll make you feel bad for realizing you’re better off and you struggle with if you want to go or be understanding. I will say, being an empath will make this decision hard because we try to see the best in everyone and every situation. It’s a gift and a curse! It’s actually gotten me in some BAD situations and I have to learn to hone my spiritual gift of empathy.

In all, relationships are actually not hard. If they are, you need to re-evaluate WHO you’re with. When it gets to this point, they will have a death grip on you to stay. Let me just say, this is your cue to get out! We overlook the red flags for our own selfish reasons for validation, but it’s not worth it. Trust me, staying means losing a part of yourself every day until you are depleted and begging God to free you from this person. I’m a big believer of positive relationships because I’ve been in plenty of toxic ones. This isn’t a dig at anyone, but if you feel it is, please change! Again, my blog so I post things that are important to me. I truly hope that anyone (man or woman) reading this will try to move forward knowing that love bombing is real, and so is narcissism, gaslighting, and bread crumbing. We just need to pray and continue to operate in godly discernment. And if you’re in an abusive relationship, please get help ASAP because you deserve so much better! Push come to shove, call me and I’ll beat them up…I know karate and crazy…pick one! As always, Be Sweet.

Happy New Year! Let’s just start by saying WE MADE IT. Instead of yelling happy new year at the stroke of midnight, I yelled “thank you Lord!” Last year was super tough and many hard lessons, but I didn’t break. But this post isn’t to dwell on 2023 any longer, it’s to celebrate the fact that we have new mercy, grace, and favor for a new year (as well as every single day). I intend to allow the Lord to use me and make me more for His glory. This year will be deemed The Bounce Back.

While at the night watch service on New Year’s Eve, a church member that I truly respect came up to me and encouraged me. Then she asked me if I was listening to God when I pray for direction. Y’all, it blew me away because it was like the Holy Spirit was convicting me! It wasn’t a mean inquiry and you could tell it was solely out of love. I answered truthfully and said sometimes yes and sometimes no. I was sitting right on the third pew of church, so I surely wasn’t going to lie. And lying wouldn’t have made it better anyway, because I need to re-evaluate my life for this year to be Better.

I always say that this is going to be God’s year, not mine. I’m not the creator of the universe, I didn’t hang the sun in the sky, I didn’t make myself. And because I understand there’s a God that can do all of those things, I’m putting my faith and year in His hands. Truth be told, I want to encourage you to do the same. Ask yourself, what does God want me to do more often. Start a Bible plan because it’s literally the playbook for life. If we want better, we have to do something different. I’m not saying there won’t be bad days, we will just be more prepared for every battle with God by our side. Be Sweet.

As this wild and crazy 2023 comes to an end

I suppose the theme was how much can she bend

If I went down the long list of all I had to take

You will surely ask how did I not break

It’s because of the Lord’s keeping power

It’s because I prayed and trusted every hour

The devil wanted to steadily steal my joy

And played with my heart like a toy

But I’m thankful for mercy and grace

And I stood tall after all that took place

So if you keep pressing towards the mark

God will never leave you in the dark

I rejoice in His goodness all the more

Because I know He is already in my 2024

This year is almost over and it’s time to do some much needed evaluation before 2024 creeps in on us. I will be the first to say 2023 really shocked me. I thought my life was going in one direction and it did a full 180 on me! Do y’all remember playing Red Rover as a kid? You would try to run through their arms to break the hold. Well I feel like as I was running to break free from the craziness of 2022, they (2022 & 2023) decided to clothesline me and now I’m on the ground with the wind knocked out of me. I’m legit re-evaluating my whole life, like what in the actual heck happened!

Nevertheless, I picked myself up from the ground and dusted myself off. I’m no punk! And if there’s one thing I’ve learned, you will get knocked down a few times. The question is, will you stay down? I laugh at the new phrase, “life be life-ing” because if it weren’t, we would be dead. It comes down to finding something that grounds you, and in my case it’s God. Having a sense of self through His eyes allows me to feel I have the strength to press through. The devil really be thinking he’s doing something, but he can’t keep you down if you have your mind on the only one who can reach out His hand and pull you up after each knockdown.

Another thing I’ve learned this year, is that a sound mind is a powerful thing. I’m so glad the devil didn’t take my mind! Mental health is so important, and this year I learned why the hard way. This is why having God’s Word is key to sustaining your mind. Whatever you think your actions will project that. A phrase I’ve been using lately is that “no man is an island.” We need each other and that’s okay to have people in your life who encourage you to become your best self. You better believe that’s going to be much needed in life. 2023 may not have ended the way I hoped, but I press through because God is not through blessing me. 2024, I’m ready for you and I won’t back down.

As I’m embarking on a new journey of my fourth life, I have come to realize that life is full of lessons. I say that because I keep having recurring dreams about being in school. I attribute it to the fact that God wants me to learn some lessons, or possibly many. One of those lessons is learning from my mistakes in Atlanta. The most important thing is that if I want different results, I have to try different things. This is mainly about meeting new people, embracing new adventures, and staying positive. I’m the type that needs to be connected to people, I’m an extrovert and no man is an island. The average American moves twice a decade. In a 4 years span, I’ve moved to 3 different cities and twice to a new residence in Los Angeles and Atlanta. That’s 5 life changing events.

As they say, life has been life-ing and I’m cool with that because of it wasn’t that means I’d be dead. I expect life to have its ups and downs, but I feel I need to stay prepared and make better choices going forward. My own personal choices led me to Houston and I feel like it started rough, but I can easily recoup if I get connected to my people. I need to create a life that I don’t need escaping from, so that requires being open to new things. That means I look on TikTok, Eventbrite, and Instagram for ideas of what to do in the 4th largest city in the country. And let me say, there’s soooo much to do here! I need a new hobby besides going to the movies and restaurant hopping.

Everyone seems to think I enjoy relocating from place to place. Simply put, I do not. I want to settle down with my kingdom spouse and have healthy babies and sit down somewhere. I like traveling, not picking up and moving for the heck of it. So I have to be intentional about Houston. I lost myself after my situation in Atlanta, and I’m ready to get back to ME! I have to actually leave my apartment, talk to people when I’m out, and go places after 5pm. I go and sit at the bars of different restaurants and go to brunch, but people tend to go out when it gets dark. That’s my problem, I want to be in the bed. But that’s boring and unhelpful in making new friends. If you want something different, you have to do something different. I’m keeping my hopes high and very appreciative of those I’ve already hung out with. Houston, it’s time to see what you’re made of…don’t disappoint!