Have you ever found yourself asking the Lord why? Why did I lose my job? Why did we break up? Why is my life so hard right now? Well, I feel like I’m at the point where this is the valley…a low point. The entire time I was unemployed for seven months, I wasn’t sad mad, or anything negative, but now it’s different. Now that I have a new job, I’m completely miserable! Now I know you’re probably thinking what in the world. But sometimes things come into your life that look like blessings, and end up disturbing your peace heavily! When you are in desperate situations, you make desperate decisions. And I feel like taking this job in particular was an error on my part because I knew deep down that I did not want to be in the mental health or social services field, but I knew that I needed a job desperately. And that led me to writing this blog entitled, “The Valley Low.”Now, I don’t want the skeptics to think that I’m complaining, but I’m being realistic and it’s OK to be real with people about your testimony. That just means that you’re helping someone else to not be fake when they’re going through.
Stay with me during this blog because I’m about to get real real. Some of this may be new to most and repetition to others, but either way I’m about to be very transparent about my situation right now. One thing about being a woman of faith is that you don’t deny reality. I don’t want anyone to think I’m not grateful, but I know I can do better than this, but I’m broke and need a check. It’s tiring asking people for money. And before we get further into this, I can hear you judging me now. You’re saying things like why didn’t she save money, why is she acting like she’s better than, why won’t she move back home, or whatever else. Well, I pray you never have to be put in this situation without having radical faith. Settling has NEVER been my thing, whether it be a relationship, job, or city. At this point, you’re either talking about me or you’re praying hard for me. Both are a part of my testimony, so choose your side now and stay tuned for the comeback!
Closed doors can make room for open doors. Losing my last job was a blessing. That job was just as toxic as my ex! Yep, said it and meant it. Remember, this is me being super honest and not sugar coating my life’s problems. I actually enjoyed the job, but 2 of my coworkers were mean girls. I was relieved to get away because that job showed me that I have leadership skills and I belong in corporate America, just in a different position. I was killing the game and that’s not me bragging…you can ask anyone who worked with me. So now that I’m at a job that lacks structure and has no real benefits, I’m flabbergasted and I feel like I was bamboozled. They said I’d be doing one thing and quickly dissolved me to mainly case management (which I loathe). I convinced myself to go for it, and thought this was an answer to my problem because I refused to work for the temp job in a call center again. At this point, whyyyy does the devil think I’m free game?! What he failed to realize is that “the valley of the shadow of death” is an illusion! It looks bleak now, but it’s not the final destination for a child of God who knows Him as a way maker.
The Bible says, after you have suffered a while, the God of all grace will restore you. And I’m crazy enough to believe God can and will do just that if I keep moving forward. Whoever you are on the mountain top is who you need to be in the valley. This season has allowed me to master that. I’ve learned the major lesson of waiting well. Instead of being a crybaby and wondering when I was going to get a new job, I embraced the freedom and allowed the rest to make me a better person. But now I feel like I’m learning a new lesson. I haven’t quite put my finger on what the new lesson is about, but when I find out I will pass the test because I refuse to let the devil win!
The devil don’t run nothing over here with Monica Bentley! I know you’re probably thinking this girl is flat out crazy. You are exactly right. I’m crazy enough to believe that my God can and will. I have evidence of God‘s miracle working power, therefore, I will have the confidence that he can do it again. I may not be in the best situation right now, but I know that trouble won’t last always. I know it sounds cliché and you’re probably thinking she’s just talking herself up so she won’t breakdown. Well, you’re right because the Bible says to “speak those things that are not as if they were.” And so that is what I will continually do. I will continually tell myself positive things because I’m looking for a positive outcome from a God who can do anything but fail! So if you have helped and can help, I appreciate you. If you can’t help me, that’s fine too just pray. Either way there will be a testimony that will soon come and will blow the minds of not just myself, but others who doubt it and who did not believe like I did. I continually ask God to make me a living testimony. So I’ll pray for you, and you pray for me… Be sweet.
